Sometimes Things Just Fall Into Place

I'm going to honest - this summer wasn't easy. We spent the first half sweating through late hours at a job plus six hours a day in class and the second half trying to figure out how to survive without going to school the rest of the summer. It was a long second half and we are still figuring things out, but a lot of stuff seems to be lining up the right way.

First was the job situation. I applied at the BYU Math Lab back in December before landing a job at the BYU Bookstore. I thought they weren't interested in me or that my test scores had sucked miserably. Nope. They just had a different sense of timing. A few weeks ago they emailed me and asked if I could come in for an interview. I did and they gave me a job. Not only that, but they gave me the hours I wanted and it increases my current pay by $0.75 (not a lot unless you're a poor student like me) with another increase once I finish my current math class and teach higher math in the lab.

On top of the new job and pay, I will be reviewing and teaching the math I need to know fluently for three hours a day every weekday. According to research you retain around 90% of what you teach,
so I'll finally master calculus. Gotta love that.

Then, I will be able to get my tutor certification through them which is great because I already have one pupil and am taking on a second one this semester. I picked up the second one from a friend of my boss at work. So really, I will be spending around 30+ hours a week on math not including homework (but including class time). That is good for a Math Education Major.

I am excited for the semester to begin on Monday. I know we still have challenges to face (bills are never resolved around here like we'd hope), but with some obvious divine approval in my choice of careers, I feel that the rest will work out one way or another. We just have to maintain an attitude of faith and believe that God is at the helm. We'll make our choices and trust in him for the rest.

Don't Sweat the Small Stuff

I was talking to a friend at work on Friday about past jobs and things. I told her about my job at the car dealership in Tucson and how much I hated it. I really didn't like selling cars - it just never sat right in me to try and convince someone to go into $20,000 of debt for a car that wouldn't be worth that much in a month.

Well, while talking to her she made an interesting point. Said she:

Perhaps we have crappy jobs to let us know we don't like them.

The first thing that popped into my head was Michael Jordan. His abilities with a basketball always amazed me. A week or so ago I learned he didn't even make the high school basketball team. That man put so much work into figuring out how to make the game work for him that he became one of the best players ever.

I have had a lot of different jobs in my short employment record. In order:

• Handyman Assistant
• [Missionary]
• Theatre Staff
• Baker's Assistant
• Organ Salesman (musical kind and for one week)
• New/Used Car Salesman
• Cashier
• Cook
• Job Coach (for the mentally disabled)
• Warehouse Jobs (same company, different positions)
• Warehouse Staff
• Roofing Bay Lead-man
• Assistant Manager
• Bookstore Clerk
• doTERRA IPC

And I know I am not finished yet.

What I do know is what works and doesn't work for me. I have been able to do all of these jobs (minus the organ salesman) for a period of time and remain employed (haven't been fired yet) until my own choice to leave. But I have only felt happy when teaching or healing others. My church callings helped to seal the deal on the teaching and our involvement with doTERRA has given me the chance to heal others. I love it.

Another thing we talked about at work was letting go. I, like others, am haunted by my past mistakes. I feel like a horrible person for them and beat myself up sometimes for it. My friend gave another piece of advice - Let it go.

A year and a half ago I received a blessing that promised I was clean at that moment. I need to remember to not dwell on my sins (big or small) from before that time. I also need to let go of the little mistakes from recently. I sin like everyone else and it doesn't matter how much I think I should have "seen it coming" or been able to avoid it. In fact, it is in making mistakes that we learn and grow. We just have to learn not to dwell on them and what we did, but focus on what we can do better next time.

I am always grateful for the inspirational words of friends and colleagues. They are a strength to me every time.

Last Day at Work

Today I left my job for the past 3 1/2 years. I was going to be leaving tomorrow, but we've been so slow lately that I spoke to my boss and he let me go early. I packed up my things and said goodbye to everyone I could before heading out the door and making my final half hour commute home. I cried quite a bit before and during that drive.

I'm going full time school (more than, actually) on Monday and playing Mr. Mom every morning this semester. Steph will be writing for the internet during the morning hours. It was hard figuring out what to do for this semester, but we knew leaving my job was the right thing to do. I will miss it, though possibly not all the cold (exposed warehouse work is a little chilly during Utah Winters).

Although it was hard work I will miss it. I learned a lot from that job. They taught me about hard work and leadership and gave me job skills like forklifting, torch-cutting and crane operating that can come in handy during future summer months. I hope they continue to do well.

Onto the new year! I will be doing a lot of school and get to see my kids every day for a few hours in the morning. I have volunteered for breakfast duty the whole semester and have a fantastic new griddle to help out there.

Life is good. Things are working out the way they should and I am grateful to all those who've given us support - tangible and non - on our new direction. Thank you for being there for us.

Life Revisited

When I was a younger man I decided what I wanted to be when I grew up. I knew I wanted to have plenty of money, since we never did growing up, and I wanted to help people. A doctor seemed right up my alley. Shortly after this decision I was visited by a prompting from the Spirit which I neither recognized nor heeded. I still remember that moment.

A decade later and I have learned more and seen more than I had imagined. Not in a tour de earth or scholastic sense, but in a life lessons way. My abilities in various fields are not lacking and I was told by the Spirit years ago that I would be good at whatever I choose to do. But prestige (PhD) has never been a good enough reason and money is no longer the driving force. So what did I learn and what am I going to do about it?

I learned that following God is best. To never choose an option that removes me from his grace. To always stay true to myself and to the gospel. To follow the guidance of the Spirit when given and to put my family first.

Elder Henry B Eyring, speaking on the family, once said, "The difference in cost between what the world tells you is necessary and what your children really need could allow you the margin in time that a father and mother might need with their children to bring them home to their Heavenly Father," (The Family, BYU Speeches, 1995). That verse is pure gospel. Think of all the things we don't really need. TV, movies, big houses, and even things like dishwashers, cars, in home laundry machines and so forth can be done without if needed. And possibly not having to work the extra long shift at the demanding job to pay for them would provide the opportunities for a family to stay together.

Stephanie and have been talking about this idea of more time at home verses more money. We have agreed completely that my presence at home is far more important than unnecessary luxuries.

With that let me go back ten years and explain what the aforementioned prompting said. I had been reevaluating my future career options since the prospect of a decade in school, especially after high school, coupled with long hours seemed a little too far out there; so the doctor thing was out the window. But what to do now?

In the briefest of conversations I felt the idea thrust upon me: You could be a teacher. That was it. There was no fanfare, no forced opinions and certainly no angelic visitations. Just a simple and clear thought. I, of course, dismissed it immediately as I had seen my parents suffer with poor pay checks, demanding schedules and often dreary summer jobs to make ends meet. Why would I inflict that on myself and my future family

A week and half ago I felt another prompting: You are a teacher. I have been teaching various gospel classes for years now in different callings. They have been the joy of my life outside my family. Nothing makes me happier than to help another person learn and grow in some respect. I have even taught things like math on the side. I don't seem to be able to get away from it and it has finally broken through to me what this all means.

I AM A TEACHER! I don't know what I will be teaching plus the financial burden will be hard and the effort great, but I know that the best thing for me is to teach in some way. Even just thinking about it makes me feel at peace and like I finally understand part of who I am.

The part that is best for me is that it really is my choice. God never told me to do it. He just allowed me chances to experience it and learn for myself who I was and what makes me happy. He told me years ago that I would do well at whatever I chose to do and I choose this - teaching.

Now all that is left is to figure out what to teach; oh, and finish school...